A How-To guide to create Side-Splitting Survival Kits

Side-Splitting Survival Kits

Do you know someone who is retiring and have no idea what to get them as a gift? Perhaps you need something to give to your child’s teacher as a nice gesture? Do you just need a little something to acknowledge a person with a witty sense of humor? Well look no further. This post is for you.

Whether you make your own gag gift or buy one (hopefully from me, you can buy it here), this is your how-to guide! These are Side-Splitting Survival Kits that I have handmade for such occasions. Please note that this is a gag gift and only intended to amuse. Furthermore, there are many versions of this online and I do not proclaim them to be my original idea.

Picture of Side-Splitting Survival Kits


Here are the materials that I used to create this Retirement Survival Kit.

  • a white paper bag
  • burlap
  • glue and glue dots
  • blue tags
  • mailing labels
  • a printer

Materials used for Side-Splitting Survival Kits

Inside the Retirement Survival Kit there is a…

  • Small piece of burlap
  • Balloon – to start your celebration off with a “BANG”
  • Starburst – for a burst of energy when you need it
  • Flower – to remind you to take time to smell the flowers
  • Stars – to let the stars be your guide
  • Gold – because you are worth your weight in gold
  • Marble – to replace the ones you lost while working
  • Felt Heart – to remind you to follow your heart
  • Candle – so your future looks bright
  • Charm – with an inspirational charm
  • Felt pocket

all things inside the Side-Splitting Survival Kits

Now that you have seen whats inside, let me show you how I made them.

First, I put glue dots on the bag at the bottom and then again about half way up because it is what holds up the burlap.

White bag with glue dots for Side-Splitting Survival Kits

Now cut a piece of burlap about 40 cm long and begin attaching it to the bag until you have gone all the way around it. I added glue dots on each side of the bag to secure the burlap.

Attaching burlap to white bag for Side-Splitting Survival Kits

This is what you end up with…

Bag with burlap for Side-Splitting Survival Kits

I then punch 2 holes in the top of the bag so I can hang the tag on it later.

bag with holes for Side-Splitting Survival Kits

Now to prepare the tag with a label. The labels that I used are standard mailing labels that I formatted the way I wanted them then printed them out on one sheet. I simply place the label on the tag and grab a piece or ribbon to secure it to the bag.

Label with tag for Side-Splitting Survival Kits

I also want to mention that I make many variations of these survival kits that suite teachers, fishermen, nurses just to name a few. You can check them all out here.

I then take another piece of burlap that will house all the sweet things inside. I place the items on the burlap and position them so I can fold the two ends of the burlap together than secure it with a cute little flower.

Folded burlap that houses the items for Side-Splitting Survival Kits

The final touches for the bag are simple to secure the tag using the ribbon and I like to place a pretty flower on the outside of the bag as well because, well, it looks pretty!!

Side-Splitting Survival Kits


You can always attach some lace ribbon to make handle for the bags as well. I put glue on each end of the lace and secure them inside the bag o each side. This is what it looks like.

Bag with lace handles for Side-Splitting Survival Kits

This is simple my version of the Side-Splitting Survival Kits. There are many alternatives that you could use instead of what I have chosen to use. Have fun with it!

Until my next post!

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